helpless relationship

A kind of affection is only not wanna make her angry.If she is angry,I will feel uneasy in heart,cheap jerseys， just feeling parents watching me and I can't make parents disappointed.To be frank,never miss her,or feel any moved,just a kind of relationship.I know I won't think of her even though I need help one day.That sentence is right,one of  terrible distances is that both's hearts are so far in spite of standing so close.With its nature,i don't wanna care about anyone intentionally,because love only rises from the heart.However,in all recalls with her,there is no real care and love.Her terrific face while angry already makes me hate so much.A large pressure comes to me while being with her.Sometimes I am puzzled,too,why will I always do what I don't want to do  to please her,the words from my mouth are always gone through my brain many times,aviod making her unhappy,however,listening to her words which are always with critiques,I only keep sillent.Sometimes,I really feel it very ridiculous.I can't believe there is someone in the world thinking herself without any faults,thinking herself perfect.hh.However,what should do?just to cater to her.Nobody can change.But the time with her together is usually my suffering.Maybe these true words willl never be spoken out until death.In fact,I don't want to hurt
 her at all.I have no other persons to miss besides my small family.Those are going far,who love me,cheap snapback hats， please take care!I No one can replace you forever in my heart.Although a bit lonely while thiniking of these,I will live a better life.